To Hell and back – a sweet side trip

Screams Ice Cream in Hell, Michigan

Screams Ice Cream in Hell, Michigan

There is a quiet little village along nestled along a lonely road in the countryside between Lansing and Detroit, Michigan. The place? Hell, Michigan and with Halloween just around the corner it is a great side trip for those with a sense of humor.

The Creamatory at Screams Ice Cream

The Creamatory at Screams Ice Cream

You can drop by Screams Ice Cream for a tasty treat (HERShey’s ice cream, of course!) after a game of miniature golf or have dinner at the Screams Diner.

The Post Office in Hell, Michigan

The Post Office in Hell, Michigan

You may also go to Hell in a Handbasket where you can send a letter from Hell, perhaps to let your soon to be ex know that you are breaking up or to let the boss know you are changing jobs.

You can even be Mayor for a Day for $100.  With that package you get key to the town of Hell, a deed to one square inch of Hell (including a vial with dirt in it) and an official “Mayor of Hell” with “Impeached” stamped across the back of it.  You also get a name badge and official documents proclaiming you as mayor of Hell and impeaching you.

Get a Diploma or memorabilia from Damnation University

Get a Diploma or memorabilia from Damnation University

For only $13 you can buy a diploma from Damnation University (Dam U for short) and receive a bachelors degree in various topics such as computer addiction and relationship avoidance.  The Dam U motto is “Illegitmus Non Te Carborundum” (don’t let the…  illegitimate ones wear you down.)

See where Hell Creek is dammed

See where Hell Creek is dammed

While in Hell you will want to drop by the creek and see where it was dammed.  If you want to marry in the wedding chapel, be sure to call for reservations.  For $100, the chapel holds a party of 8-10 with catering and an outdoor reception being extra.

Hell occasionally has special events such as the Hell Fest on September 21, 2013 when they will attempt to retake the Guinness World Record for the most hearses in a parade at their Nightmare Cruise parade.

While Hell is a great place to pick up your Halloween decorations, there isn’t a bad time of the year to visit.  You can drop by when Hell freezes over and in the spring there may still be a chance of snowballs in Hell for you to throw at the weather station sign.

If Hell isn’t your thing than you can always head to the Northern Lower Penninsula until you reach Nirvana or go even further north to the Upper Penninsula where you will find Paradise, Michigan.  For those who prefer it warmer, you will find it is usually colder than Hell in Paradise, so dress warm.

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Weird AKA John Collins

John N. Collins is a writer, photographer, game & coloring book designer and a bad dancer. Any resemblance to the King John character is merely a coincidence. Follow John N. Collins: Google Plus YouTube Facebook Fan Page Facebook Personal Account Instagram Twitter